THE ONE WHERE UNCLE BOB ROCKS THE FIZZUCK OUT

Alright...granted, I never get enough sleep, we've covered that here several million times...but I didn't get to bed until 2:30 and got up at 5:30 and I'm tired and my ears are ringing and my voice is hoarse and my hands are bleeding and my hips are aching.

But kids...be proud. Your Uncle Bob rocked the fuck out last night.

Mr. Springsteen and his E Street Band were worth the 20-plus year wait to see. I can honestly say that perhaps with the exception of the Rolling Stones, I've never seen a show quite like this.

Screw that. The Boss beat the Stones hands down.

He played two songs that I've never really cared for ("Night" and "She's The One"...both from the "Born To Run" album ... my two least favorite songs on that disc. I guess I never cared for the melody in either of them), but other than that he played 21 I absolutely loved.

After faithfully lurking on the boards at www.brucespringsteen.net for the last several months, I learned a number of things.

First...Bruce likes it when you stand up the entire time and dance your ass off.

Second ... Bruce ain't got no time for people who sit on their asses and say stuff like "When's he EVER going to play 'Born in the USA'?"

Third ... BRUCE WILL KICK YOUR ASS IF YOU ALLOW IT TO HAPPEN.

Kids ... my ass was exposed and pointed in his direction with a sign on my lower back saying "KICK IT BRUCE AND KICK IT HARD."

Sadly, I was surrounded by people who weren't alive during the first half of Bruce's career. I swear to you ... as God as my witness ... minutes before the show started, the girl in front of me turned to her fresh-faced little frat boy lover and said "Now...WHO is this we're seeing??"

Tickets were $75 apiece.

I only HOPE that guy got him some nookie after toting that airhead into the arena with him. It took everything in my power to not slap the girl in the back of her head so she spat out her smuggled Jack Daniels and Coke and screamed, "THE BOSS, MISSY!! THE BOSS!!!"

I sincerely think that I was more amusing to her than what was going on onstage. Because she kept looking back at me and smiling while I shook my groove thang for two hours and 35 minutes.

Twice I sat down and tapped my foot like a maniac. One time was at Bruce's request. Well...he told everyone to be quiet for a moment. Not like he shined a spotlight on me and said "Dude...seriously...sit your big ass down for a minute".

The second time, I was actually made to feel stupid as I was the only one dancing in several sections. Apparently, the people of Alabama haven't heard Bruce's new disc (the best disc of the year, BTW), and every time he'd play a new song (with the exception of the opening song "The Rising"), they'd either sit their asses down with their arms folded across their chests or they'd run to get more beer so that when he finally played "Born in the USA", they could all take their shirts off and wave them around their heads, screaming "WHOOO-HOOOOO!!" and vomiting on each other like the true Alabama rednecks that they were.

Thankfully, he never played "Born in the USA".

The guy's 53 years old and slid across the stage twice on his knees. It really was too cool for words.

The band rocked.

I'm tired.

'Nuff said.

Oh...hey...man oh man...when I ask, I shall receive...and you all put my mind COMPLETELY at ease over this whole "Son getting tubes in his ears" worry that I had.

Each and every one of you that sent emails and left countless messages on the message board...thank you all so much. While 90% of the stories were positive, a few reminded me that we ARE talking about surgery (minor surgery, but surgery nevertheless) and that there's always risks with surgery.

Still...last year I had a tube stuck in my heart.

My kid's getting tubes in his ears.

I made it okay.

He will too.

God loves us.

Even if I did use the word "ass" in this entry a little more than most states would allow under a court of law.

Seriously, it was so cool to get so much feedback and input from you guys. It also put the wife at ease who finally looked at my site and message board for the first time in three years.

She thanks you all too.

Well...not literally. I think right now she's sawing logs in the bedroom.

She rocked her fanny off too last night. She's a converted Bruce-a-holic and can't wait to watch his Live DVD tonight.

Hell.

I'll be lucky to make it past noon and still be semi-alert.

That's it...I'm tired, this is being posted late and I've got to get ready for work.

Rawk on wi' cha bad se'ves.

If you get the chance to see Bruce and want to see the greatest show on Earth, your Uncle Bob gives him a full stamp of approval.

Kick.

Ass.

Show.