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7:43 a.m. - 2004-08-05

OH THAT UNCLE BOB ... HE'S HILARIOUS!!!

So the big question ... was my "Famous Last Words" from a few weeks ago really going to be my last entry?

I dunno.

I put that up there knowing that I was going on vacation and wouldn't be updating for a week.

It was more of an experiment to see how people would gradually begin to form their own theories on what had happened to me since it's been a while where I didn't update for a full week.

Am I ready to leave Diaryland?

Some days ... yeah. I am. There's stuff that goes on in my real life that I don't share in this diary which drains me physically and mentally to the point where having to come here and be entertaining or interesting is not an appealing option.

This diary was started for one sole reason. Well, two actually.

It was a companion piece to my first website which was shut down years ago.

And it was a place where people could check in on me to see how I was doing. Before Diaryland, I loved frequenting a certain chat room on IRC. I'm not even sure IRC is still around ... it's been three years or so since I went in my old chat room.

I made lots of friends there as we held IRC "parties" every night of the week. And once I realized that my real life was being compromised by my IRC life, I decided to walk away from the IRC world.

Now I get up early in the morning and do my diary and spend my evenings with my family which please my wife a whole lot more than those nights when she had to compete against the computer for my attention.

Somewhere along the way, this diary went from being a place where a handful of old friends could keep up with my daily life into a place where thousands of strangers started knowing more about me than I ever wanted them to know.

So I worked hard to keep my anonymity.

The first year I did this diary, I didn't really care if people knew my real name or where I lived. That didn't bother me.

But in early 2002, we got a phone call one night. Caller ID said it was an unknown number so I didn't bother to pick it up, thinking it was a telemarketer.

"Uncle Baaah-aaaahb ... I know where you liiiiiiive!"

*Click*

There's very little in life that scares me. But that phone call scared the shit out of me. I had a little baby and a wife who had no business being involved with some psycho.

Ever wonder why we moved into another town and house so quickly?

While that wasn't the main cause of it, it had a lot to do with the final decision. People were having anthrax mailed to them, I had made a habit of getting under people's skin with the things I wrote here and quite frankly, I didn't want some psychotic reader coming after my family.

So I did everything in my power to stay as anonymous as possible.

That's why I rarely answer emails or get into conversations with people on my comments and message boards. Sorry folks, but you just never know who's on the other end.

Anyway ... that's just a small reason why I wanted to stop writing here.

Another reason is that I've simply gotten bored with my life and that leaves little to write about here.

So when I wrote the Famous Last Words thing in the state of mind I was in, for all intents and purposes that was to be my final entry here.

But when I came back, rejuvenated from a fun vacation and with a new job offer on the table, things changed and I had things to write about.

So I'm writing here again.

But I've got to be honest ... I have no idea for how much longer.


As far as the 811 comments left for me while I was gone ... wow.

I didn't read them all because I haven't had six hours to sit and read 'em all.

I knew that as the days went by and I didn't post, conspiracy theories would start flying ... but I didn't expect that many comments.

And while I found it amusing that you guys started having fun with the whole thing ... I was disturbed by some of you using my real name and location.

(I have since removed that entry and all 811 comments with it. Sorry. It was like a work of art but in order for me to go through and remove every reference to my family name, it would have taken hours that I simply don't have time to devote to such a task. Sorry for punishing everyone for the actions of a few, but sometimes ya gotta do what ya gotta do.)

As I stated before, I've tried hard to stay anonymous here.

I went so far as to not put my real name in the book "Never Threaten To Eat Your Co-Workers". I'm not sure, but I think I'm the only contributor to the book that didn't have their real name published.

Maybe it's paranoia.

But if you got a mysterious phone call during a time when the whole nation was gripped with paranoia, you'd be hesitant to put your family at risk too.

I know it sounds stupid because I know there's at least a few hundred of you out there who already have all this information. Some of you are downright proud that you're privy to this information and wave it around like it's a fucking flag.

And while I can't stop you from knowing it, I can ask that you respect my privacy and just refer to me as Uncle Bob here.

It creeps me out a whole lot less when you do.

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