I was sitting here, trying to think of something to write about other than the impending Winter Storm that my area is currently bracing for.

As I sat here, scratching my balls and thinking (the two go hand in hand), I looked up above my desk and saw my framed picture of me and Morris Day of The Time doing "The Mack" as Morris liked to call it. So I decided to write about some of the famous people I have met or interviewed over the years and their impressions left on me.

I know...whooohoooo. Cut me some slack...I've written enough about the snow that hasn't even made it to Alabama yet.

WHOOPI GOLDBERG: Nice to me but bitchy to everyone else. Very self centered. A complete slob ... her hotel room had cigarette burns in the carpet and reeked of cat piss. I ended up sleeping in her bed, but that's another story for another time.

MORRIS DAY: A great guy. I thought he would be an egotistical bastard after watching "Purple Rain" about a million times. But he was a gentleman and very personable. Same for Jerome, his sidekick, although Jerome was much more sedate. Morris was extremely sweaty.

CHEAP TRICK: Assholes. They wouldn't grant me an interview, but kept stringing me along for months that I would "eventually" get an interview. They're very wary of the press because critics hated them in the 70s. I'm a lifelong fan and would have painted them in a very positive role. When I asked Rick Nielsen (the goofy guitar player) to pose for a picture for the newspaper, thisis what he gave me.

DEANA CARTER: Much sweeter than she needed to be. Obviously a product of lots of makeup. She was tired but sat down with me for a few minutes to talk about some disease her dad had. We made a lovely pair.

GLADYS KNIGHT: Very nice. She was promoting her autobiography so we talked about the struggles she had went through throughout her career. I don't remember much about the meeting, it was a few years ago and I wasn't that big of a fan. Still, she says I'm her favorite Pip.

MISS AMERICA 1999: I cannot for the life of me remember her name, but she was the most down-to-earth celebrity I've ever met. We talked for nearly 20 minutes about diabetes, which she suffered from. At one point, she yanked down her pants a few inches and showed me her insulin pump as well as the waist band of her white panties. So technically, Miss America showed me her panties. That rocked.

SISTER HAZEL: Hey...remember THIS BAND? Actually, what I remember most about them was their intelligence. Very smart men who are probably doing well in whatever jobs they're in now, because I haven't heard from the band in years.

JASON RINGENBERG: All together now...."whoooo???" Jason is the lead singer of Jason and the Scorchers, a hot country-punk band out of Nashville that have been burning up the concert scene in the South for nearly 20 years. He was also down-to-earth and shy.

RAY CHARLES: Ray was the most intimidating man I've ever interviewed. He's a legend and was one of my heroes at the time. He almost dismissed the interview right away when my first question was "Do you think your blindness has helped or hindered your career?" He laid into me for a minute about how stupid that question was and I seriously thought I had lost the interview right then. But I apologized and it went very smoothly after that. He was very nice and polite and made sure I got backstage at his concert.

I've got plenty of others ... mostly hasbeen rockers like .38 Special, Molly Hatchet, Tommy Shaw from Styx and Damn Yankees. I'll get around to those some other time. I need to get in the shower now.

UNCLE BOB'S HOUSE OF FUN