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06:19:39 - 2000-03-06

HEY KIDS ... Wanna listen to Uncle Bob on the radio? Turn your Internet dial to RIGHT HERE Monday morning and click on the "Star 98" button if you don't hear anything within a minute or so. I'm calling in to the station about 7:15 a.m. central time and will play a guy who's getting married soon and his in-laws want to buy him a new house ... They will play my call about 7:30 a.m. CENTRAL TIME or so (approximately) and then talk about it for the rest of the show so if you wanna hear me on the radio...this is a good time and way to do it.

SHAMELESS PLUGS FOR THE WEEKEND WARRIORS

Hey you ... hope those of you who only check this diary out at work had a great weekend.

Me and the Diaryland Weekend Warriors hung out around here, had a few beers...whistled at some chicks ... had a great time ... shoulda been here...

Alright ... first off...LISTEN TO ME ON THE RADIO THIS MORNING...It should be on about 7:25 AM CENTRAL TIME .... roughly an hour away by the time I get this uploaded. Cheer me on! I'm going to be ACTING on the radio!!!

Full report later on. The one thing I hate about these calls ... they're all made up by the deejay, who tells me what to say before hand (he called me at home and told me the gist of it last night). Then...for the rest of the show, they discuss my "problem".

Today ... I play a guy whose fiancee's family wants to put a down payment on a new home for me and I don't want to "Sell my soul" to her family by being three miles from them.

Anyway...listen in...if you get there late, they'll be discussing my problem all morning long.

The thing that always gets me, is some ladies call and just bash me, no matter what my "story" is (I do these calls when asked for the station on a regular basis. I'll do ANYTHING to get my voice on radio...I'm so pathetic). And I always end up taking it somewhat personally, even though they're responding to the "character" and not me.

Christ...I'd never cut it as a bad guy in a movie. I'd have SUCH low self esteem if I were Dennis Hopper.

Dennis Hopper..."Blue Velvet"....you haven't SEEN IT?!?!?

(Uncle Bob throws a pie at you, getting you all creamy and gooey)

You MUST see "Blue Velvet". MUST.

Blame me for the nightmares that ensue. I insist.

Hey ... good God ... if you think I can pull a chuckle outta my ass from time to time, check out AFFEMANN. This nutcase has the early makings of a young Uncle Bob if I've ever seen it. I was amazed by the depth of his thoughts and the ease at which he seemed to write them.

...Plus...He gives me MAD PROPS in his latest entry.

Tee hee. I'm such a "Pet me! Pet me!!" type of dog.

No seriously ... this one goes beyond the usual "Uncle Bob is so awesome because" tribute. Which are nice. I appreciate the living SHIT outta anything you people are willing to say about me. And believe me I (hope) I'm reading each and every one of them and they really make my day to know someone reads this garbage.

But AFFEMANN credits me with turning his life around.

Which...of course...is stretching the truth to every single limitation that afore-mentioned truth can be stretched to.

...But it STILL had me laughing my ass off.

Anyway ... I'm not sure how much attention has been tossed this man's way, but for God's sakes...check him out after you check me out...some very funny shit....

Alright....

Oh ... speaking of funny shit ... I think Malkavia might be developing a little cyber crush on her ol' Uncle Bob.

Heh ... she kills me. Good job girl.

God...let's get some more free plugs outta the way for some people who've been rocking my world lately.

I've been plugging the crap outta the four geniuses who helped me get those "Five Recent Entries" on top of the page all weekend. But hey...it's Monday ... let's toss some extra-special lovin' hits their way ... Amber , Badkitty , Banky , and Malkavia all came to my HTML rescue and saved a drowning man from a pool of deadly HTML. Check each of their diaries out after you check out Affemann .

And, of course, the woman that I generally regard as the female Uncle Bob (except her sex life is MUCH more interesting) Annie Nygma will surely have a great story to lay on us today. I imagine her at the age of 60, hanging around the front porch of a Cracker Barrel, with a bonnet, apron and bifocals, spinning tales of her younger days as a nude model.

Heh. God I love her. But not in a "Banky-Sinnamon"type of way. More like a strange cousin type of way. Read her. She's ultra-cool.

My dear friend Wendigo has informed me that her diary is indeed dead. Wendigo has actually been my boss in real life on two occassions...as a newspaper editor and then she oversaw my book projects. If you go back to some of her older entries (which are all well written...they should be...she's a HELLUVA writer, folks...dare I say...AWARD WINNING) and if you see her mention a "Buzz".....

.....

.....That's me.

She was trying to protect my cyber identity. Whatta sweetie.

Anyway...there's LOTTTTS more plugs I wanna give for Diaries I LOVVVVE. Two real quickies then I gotta go...Methybeth and Plumcrazey are two diaries that I am ALWAYS glad to see updated. They're both highly entertaining writers, no matter what the subject may be. BOOKMARK them both and check them regularly. You'll be glad you did.

Alright...I've gotta get the dog walked...GET MY FUCKING CEREAL (we all know what happens when I don't get my cereal...ARMAGEDDON!!!!!!!!!!) and then I have to call the radio station.

LISTEN TO ME NOW!!!!

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Hey! Come answer my QUESTION OF THE DAY .

If you want to read my OTHER diary when UNCLE BOB was 18 and pitiful , PLUS check out my senior yearbook photo (I'm not gay...but I woulda done me...) CLICK HERE .

Be one of the cool ... the hip ... the elite... REVIEW this hunk o' dung.

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