PEPE ROCKS THE HOUSE! JUST NOT MINE

Well, luckily for everyone involved...Grandma and Pepe (aka "Peppy", "Peppayyy" and "Grandma's new friend with the extensive rap sheet")didn't get a chance to come over to the house yesterday.

We didn't get home from church until 1 p.m., Susie had Children's Choir practice at 4 p.m. and we had a Fellowship Dinner at 5:30 p.m. So we didn't have time to squeeze the happy couple into our plans.

Darn that luck!

We did find out a little more about Grandma's new friend though.

Susie called her fat, lazy American brother and he let us know that Pepe had been locked up for 10 years...seven in a prison in Louisiana and the last three in a halfway house in Florida.

Correct me if I'm wrong, which I usually am, but aren't halfway houses normally occupied by drug addicts trying to get their lives back on track?

I'm all for drug addicts getting their lives back on track...JUST NOT AROUND MY BABY!

We still have no idea why Pepe was in prison. Nobody's ready to discuss that just yet.

Susie called her sister in Texas...the mother of the dreaded knee humpers...and Sis said that we were right. We should NOT have to expose our new baby and home to Mother's latest shady and creepy friend.

So I feel better about not wanting the guy in my house. I want to be a good Christian and open my doors to anybody...just not communists with a prison record and a drug problem.

Is that so wrong?

I agreed to be on the board for the Food Pantry that our church is starting up at the end of this month.

Basically, we're feeding the poor. People that can't afford to buy groceries for their families.

Through most of the 90's, Susie and I spent time feeding the homeless on holidays. There were several Thanksgiving and Christmas days that we went to the Salvation Army and fixed these big turkey dinners for people.

We realized that EVERYONE came out on holidays to help feed the downtrodden. But during the rest of the year they were as forgotten as Gary Condit.

So with this food pantry, I'll be feeding the needy much more throughout the year. Well...I "say" feeding them...I'll be helping them find food and bagging their groceries for them.

But it'll leave me with a sense of accomplishment.

...Seeing as how I'm not the world's greatest grocery bagger...

I've been awake since 3:03 a.m. this morning.

There's no need to tell you why and who woke me up, is there?

Gawd.

I'll be glad when this kid goes off to college. Maybe then I'll get some rest.

Rev. Brian had a powerful sermon yesterday about the recent tragedy.

Basically, he had no answers for us except to say that the terror that happened in the country was not part of God's plan.

And he said he was angry. Very angry.

I almost jumped up and said "I'm angry too, Brian! And there's people out there that want to condemn me because I called the terrorists and their ilk some pretty mean names out of anger!"

But I didn't.

You know...church and all. They've got a real thing about loud outbursts during sermons unless they contain the word "Amen".

Oh!

The paper I worked for up until two months ago...Drunk Assed Boss, etc??

Well, on Tuesday when the attacks broke, Drunk Assed Boss was busy putting the paper together since I'm no longer there.

Drunk Assed Boss stole some pictures of the WTC going up in smoke and used the headline "From Kamikazes to Camel-Kazes" across the photos.

Front page headline.

I'm SURE that in his drunken state, he thought that was about the most clever thing in the world.

Yesterday's daily newspaper gave him a "Rant" in their "Rants and Raves" column that they run each weekend. "Rants" are for bad things that happened in the world each week..."Raves" are the good things.

They said they couldn't believe the insensitivity of the headline and that it not only offended Arab-Americans, it offended EVERYONE.

"Wow" I thought as I read the rant. Way to go, Drunk Assed Boss. You just pissed off America.

So we go to church yesterday and Rev. Brian starts railing against the newspaper as well and how horrible that headline was and how it spread hatred, etc.

He told me after the service that he wrote a letter to the drunk assed boss and cancelled his subscription.

I'm sure that he's not the only one.

I think today I'm going to call the newspaper and talk to some of my inside sources and find out how much feedback they've gotten on the headline.

One thing's for sure...I'm glad I'm not working for the paper anymore.

Dumbass Drunk Assed Boss.

In the midst of the chaos that comprised last week, I forgot to take my stank-assed dog in for a teeth cleaning that I had scheduled for Thursday.

It dawned on me last night as I sat in my recliner and accidently smelled my dog's breath.

"Whew," I said as I fanned the air in front of my nose. "Your breath sure does sti.....oh shit!"

So I've gotta call them today and hopefully they'll understand that the nation was in shock and shouldn't be held responsible for trivial things like getting their dog's teeth brushed.

I mean really.

Gah!

Well, it's time to go wake the sleeping terror and get his 20 lb. ass nursed so I can take him to daycare.

I need to remember to tell Miss Robin that he may be a little sluggish this morning.

...That's what three doses of Infant Tylenol at 4:15 a.m. will do to a kid...