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5:43 a.m. - 2003-06-24


It's no big secret ... I'm a big fan of mix CDs.

Maybe it is a big secret. I mean ... it's not around my house. My wife is constantly grumbling every time she steps on one of my mix CDs and I react with horror that she would dare climb up on my desk and stomp around on my mix CDs.

Anyway ... today I want to conduct an experiment ... IN TERROR!!!

...Okay ... it's not an experiment in terror. It's just an experiment. I've just always liked the term "experiment in terror". Sue me.

I want to share with you my current favorite 15 mellow tunes that can be downloaded from any MP3 downloading source like KaZaa which is my own personal favorite.


Because I want you to download them and make a playlist/disc of them so that you can share the joy I experience when I'm listening to these songs.

You see...I believe that music is a healing power.

I believe that the children are our future.

I believe Santa Claus died in a horrific explosion on his sleigh as he flew over a nuclear plant in Arizona and is now a hideously scarred creature who is never really seen by anyone anymore and all those fat fucks you see in the mall are just local fat fucks with white beards.

I believe a lot of things.

Anyway ... I'm going to tell you 15 songs that if you download them and put them on a disc, they will help create a mellow atmosphere that with repeated listenings will make you a better person.

And allow the children to be our future once and for all.

Thank you Whitney.

This entry isn't making much sense, is it?

My apologies. I woke up very quickly, ran to the computer and this is what you get.



1) "Woman In Chains" by Tears For Fears

2) "Without You" by Harry Nilsson

3) "Whip Smart" by Liz Phair

4) "Break Your Heart (Live)" by Barenaked Ladies

5) "The Scientist" by Coldplay

6) "I'm Your Man (Live)" by Leonard Cohen

7) "Better Be Home Soon" by Crowded House

8) "5:06 A.M. (Every Stranger's Eyes)" by Roger Waters

9) "Jersey Girl" by Bruce Springsteen

10) "Pieholden Suite" by Wilco

11) "Ruby's Arms" by Tom Waits

12) "What A Good Boy (Live)" by Barenaked Ladies

13) "My Melancholy Blues" by Queen

14) "When The Stars Go Blue" by The Corrs

15) "Crying" by Roy Orbison and k.d. lang case of emergency and you can't find all fifteen of these songs and you find yourself in a corner, banging your head against the wall repeatedly in a bizarre act of frustration, I'll give you five more that should be easier to find than some of the above songs.

And if you can find ALL of these songs and make a disc with all 20 songs on it, it will make you a much more beautiful person on the outside and I can GUARANTEE you ... you'll get laid more often than you've been getting laid lately.

Which is something you really need to look into. Seriously. When was the last time you had any decent sex? I'm worried about you. That's my job. You know...worrying about you...not sexing you up.

Anyway...five more:

16) "If You Were The Woman And I Was The Man" by Cowboy Junkies

17) "Run" by Collective Soul

18) "City of Dreams" by Talking Heads

19) "New York City Serenade" by Bruce Springsteen

20) "Wendell Gee" by R.E.M.'s where you come in.

Just like I wanted you to make a disc of my favorite mellow tunes and experience what mellows me out, I want to do the same with you.

You post your Fifteen Favorite Mellow Tunes on your own diary and encourage others to do the same.

THEN...come back to my message board and let me know that you've either posted them on your diary site (and give the address to your site too) and I know that at least I'll come check it out, download those 15 songs and burn them onto a disc and title them "(This Person's) Mellow 15".

If you just want to post your Mellow 15 on the message board, I guess that's cool too.

I'm just itching for some new mellow music and some new mellow discs.

So help the old man out.

In this experiment





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