SHEILA THE AMAZING TALKING BOVINE

Hey you.

Not much time for me this morning ... this working day and night thing is beginning to take its toll three weeks into the game.

Met my newest boss yesterday. This is the boss over my military base DJ Supervisor position (gah ... I've GOT to come up with a new name for that job). He was super cool ... we got along great. We've been talking on the phone for the last month (not continuously ... we hang up every now and then and give it a rest), so I knew we'd hit it off.

We had a lot of fun going out and buying stuff for the DJ booths. New DVD players, TVs, amplifiers, speakers, etc.

It's nice to see where our tax dollars are going ... my new DVD players.

Today I'm supposed to get 200 new DVDs ... all music video DVDs.

Yes. I'm officially in Heaven.

I've got a deadline tomorrow for a story I should have already written for my freelance writing job.

I haven't even started the story yet.

Ugh.

I simply haven't had time to do it.

So today, between jobs, I've got to get it written.

And also find time to spend with my family.

And watch "Survivor".

But I mean ... it's obvious ... Shii-Ann will be voted off tonight unless she wins immunity and then it's either Jenna or Big Tom.

Yeah.

As busy as I am, I can still find time to obsess over reality TV shows.

I stopped at Walmart last night after work simply because I didn't get enough "freaky people watching" fit into my schedule yesterday.

So I'm at Walmart at 12:15 at night.

There's this woman walking around the store, hair all messed up and walking around in t-shirt, shorts and bedroom slippers, hollering some unintelligible gibberish at nobody in particular.

I stopped (once I was in a safe range where if she came running at me, I could safely hide behind a Dove Soap display) and just watched this woman who was clearly enjoying some mighty fine crack rock as she strolled through the store, screaming and pushing her cart.

God bless the crazy bastards of this world.

Anyway, I bought about the cheapest aftershave/cologne I could find.

But it smells good.

It's some kinda Aqua Velva Musk crap.

Now usually, I'm a proud wearer of Old Spice.

I know, I know ... that's the cologne your Daddy wore.

Well, I'm a Daddy, dammit.

And I wear it. And chicks dig it too.

I guess I remind them of their Daddy.

Except they want to play with this Daddy's pee-pee when they smell his Old Spice-drenched ass.

I kid. I kid.

So anywhooo ... I'm looking forward to wearing my cheap-assed musk today to my telemarketing job and causing my co-workers to choke and gasp for six hours straight.

Speaking of co-workers, I think I did a good thing and hooked two of my telemarketer co-workers up with new jobs.

My wife is interviewing them both today for management positions with her store.

I hope they get the jobs.

They're good guys and deserve a break.

Sorry this is so gawdawful boring, but I'm on a limited time schedule this morning and should technically be doing some research for my story.

Or going over contracts for my newest job.

Or returning phone calls.

Or something else.

But dammit ... I love you guys.

And I just wanted to touch base with ya's.

Take care.