UNCLE BOB PULLS A MARIAH CAREY AND FREAKS OUT

Wow.

You know...suddenly...I've got more work than I can handle at the office.

I don't know how in the world this happened. The other day I surfed the web for eight hours. Today, this is the first time I've gotten on a site other than Thesaurus.com all day.

It's been kinda crazy.

I told y'all I'm having to write captions for the local book in my earlier entry today which can be accessed at the bottom of this entry. I'd link it, but I don't have enough time and don't feel like exerting the effort. Blow me, I'm busy.

So anyway, those captions all need more information added to them.

How does one get said information?

One calls every single person in the city, trying to drum up info on these pictures.

So far, the only one I've been able to get in contact with was the general manager of the State Fair here in town.

This lady knows me from my newspaper days. I've always participated in her media events which I documented for your amusement, if you'd just take the damned time to click on the link I just provided you with.

She didn't know that I had left the newspaper (further proof that absolutely NOBODY in this town took the time to ever read my damned column...which is why I don't work for them anymore...ungrateful bastards...) and she wanted to discuss my new job.

I just called needing some facts about the fair.

She wanted to talk about what's going on in my life.

Look lady...if you gave two shits, you woulda been a faithful reader of my damned column.

She wanted to prattle on and on about the fair...how many rides they had, some of the past entertainment, the history of the fair...

Lady.

This is 2-3 sentences about the fair. This is NOT a story. Two sentences...maybe three ... that's all I'm scrounging for here.

I finally just cut her off, telling her I had enough information for a damned BOOK on the fair, let alone 2-3 sentences. She said it was a shame that I wouldn't be participating in the media challenge this year...they were going to be doing karaoke.

"Oh darn," I said, with the phrase dripping with sarcasm.

"Maybe you can go back to work there," she suggested.

"Ha ha," I fake laughed. "Never!"

She laughed and said it was good to hear from me again.

I laughed and said it would be the last time she ever heard from me, you stuttering old windbag.

Okay.

So just in case the captions weren't enough....

I wrote four little quotes about a month ago and sent them to California to be approved by four major companies.

I wrote the quotes because the companies had not provided us with quotes that were lengthy enough. They were about 20 words long, we needed 100 words.

So I sent those off.

...And consequently forgot about them, since I was kinda just doing one of the editors a favor in doing so.

Today the editor emails me and asks if I ever heard back from the four companies.

Holy crap! I forgot all about them!

So she asks if I can find out the status on the four quotes.

Sure. No problem.

Wrong. Big problem.

One of the downsides of this job is that we're dealing with major corporations every day. Corporations who are just a tad too busy to help you out when you want a quote from them.

So...they never return calls or emails.

NEVER.

So I have to become an elusive hunter for these people. I have to hide in email bushes and jump out and grab them and say "WHERE THE HELL ARE THOSE QUOTES?!?"

Consequently, they run away with their hands over their ears, their eyes shut and going "LA LA LA LA LA LA LA I CAN'T HEAR A WORD YOU'RE SAYING, LA LA LA LA LA LA LA"

This frustrates me to no end.

Today, two of the four have emailed me back, saying "What quotes?"

Hey, at least they emailed me back.

Sooo...I'm trying to force people in California to write quotes for me, I'm trying to track down people here in town to give me vital information, I've got two stories that I need to start writing quickly but I've gotta get all this other stuff first.

Then...Save Craig neatly sums up my life in one quick sentence.

And it makes me realize ... I'm not alone.

Maybe I've forgotten just what it's like to be this busy.

I'll say one thing...the day has just flown by...so I enjoy being busy.

But...I just wanna do a good job on everything and it's tough when I'm doing 3-4 things at once.

I love my job though.

Love it, love it, love it.

I'm just having a freak out moment.

And thought I'd share it with you.

Thanks for listening.

Now...if you'll excuse me...I've gotta go write a caption about the local symphony.

Gooooo ME!!!